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Cake day: February 28th, 2025

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  • It’s the same phenomena as when your parents try to give you good advice but you will only listen to it if it comes from the mouths of “outsiders”.

    Example: my boyfriend tried to get me into Tool for ages and I was very indifferent to it. Then my closest colleague starts playing Tool at work and I’m like “omg this music is awesome” and I go home and tell my bf about this amazing new band I have gotten into and he just gets so offended like “I literally tried to get you into it for years wtf”. We laugh about it sometimes.



  • I give my man compliments all the time. He calls me silly and pretends he doesn’t care, but I think it is working. Have been running a semi-non stop compliment campaign since Covid where I tell him how beautiful his hair is in the hopes he will cut it less. It’s been a good while since he last came home looking like a sheep after shearing. Summer is approaching, though, so I’m bracing myself for him getting the idea to visit the barber and have him mutilate those beautiful locks of his. It should be crime, honestly.



  • Denmark = the flawed boyfriend who knows he’s been letting her down and is trying to fix it.

    Greenland = the pretty girl who is tired of her boyfriend’s behavior, but wants to make it work because he is trying to improve.

    America = the nice guy incel who who used to be Denmark’s best friend and thinks he has a chance with the girl.

    America doesn’t understand that Greenland isn’t interested. America doesn’t understand that Greenland isn’t her boyfriend’s property. America doesn’t understand that Greenland is her own woman with her own hopes and dreams. She’s nothing more than a pretty girl he wants to boost his ego. She keeps telling him that she’s trying to work it out with her boyfriend and even if they decide to break up she still doesn’t want to be with America.

    America = that’s just your boyfriend talking. I know you want me.

    Proceeds to harrass and stalk her wherever she goes with unwanted advances and ignores her rejections. Makes alphamale threats toward Denmark who is just standing there like “please respect my girlfriend’s boundaries.”

    Tune in next time when we find out if America decides to cross over from stalking and threats to rape and murder or if he finally accepts the rejection.


  • Adam was made from clay. Eve was made from Adam’s rib and had the audacity to eat some goofy apple. As punishment, all women were doomed to be in horrible pain during childbirth and since they were made from Adam’s rib, they are also a man’s property. Religion is so kind to us, lol.

    That’s one of the many reasons why I am a bigger fan of science. It makes more sense and is impartial. If anything, the laws of nature is brutally indifferent to who or what you are and will fuck you over or bless you at random. I can deal with that.


  • Nangijala@feddit.dktoGreentext@sh.itjust.worksAnon critiques humanity
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    12 days ago

    Female specimen bleeds once a month and is plagued by hormonal fuckery that makes life unbearable at times. Emotional regulation: hahaha fuck you. Physical discomfort: yessir. Terrible pain from cramps, hormonal migraines and other such hormone related pains: amazing. Acne, oily hair, skin, smelly sweat and bloatedness when hormones go brrrrr: cool.

    Vag-hole too small to squeeze out baby head and will often rip open. If unlucky, female specimen will bleed to death after giving birth, leaving baby without protection and food source. Female specimen only has a very small window to procreate and is most fertile when her brain is the least developed post puberty. When her brain is finally catching up in maturity, her body is starting to regress in fertility and getting pregnant is now a risk to her and the baby. Is somehow blamed and often punished for her biology literally fucking with her from the age of 9 to menopause.

    I would fucking love if my biggest problem was that my reproductive organs were dangling between my legs and got a bit hot once in awhile.


  • Their brand of diversity is some bs anyways so you don’t have to be pro Disney.

    Remember, they gladly took help from a Chinese concentration camp to make their girl boss Mulan remake.

    They also fired all their park workers during covid and gave themselves 10 million bonuses while their workers were surviving on food stamps. Some workers had even signed non compete clauses so they literally could not use their talents elsewhere to feed themselves.

    Further more, Disneys current version of DEI is divisive, soulless and insincere.

    It isn’t a black or white situation. You can hate Disney AND MAGA. To me, they are all two sides of the same rotten coin. Ruthless, selfish and greedy people who use others to get ahead and pull the ladder up after themselves.



  • I never claimed otherwise. I’m just tired that this 92 meme is using outdated language (or numbers rather) to make a point that may have been reasonable to make in the 1800s, but not today. Doesn’t mean our number system is any less retarded today. If anything, I’m just adding on to the fact that Danes are notoriously lazy with the Danish language and will cut corners with all words and sentences the same way Americans cut corners when they chop everybody’s name up into bite sized nicknames. For us, though, it’s more like slurring at the end of a word and flat out ignoring letters that are very clearly there in the word.

    Woe is the poor asshole who decides to immigrate here and attempts to learn the cancerous gargle that is our language.

    That said, it is still the best language to curse in and when used in poetry, it can be downright majestic.

    But yeah, our curses are superior to all words in the English language.

    My favourite for life will always be kræftedme = cancer eat me - usually uttered in a sentence to underline how pissed off you are and how serious you are about being pissed off.


  • More like 2 and half fives. Half five is our word for 90. So in essence we say 2 and 90 but the word 90 is half five.

    80 is fours

    70 is half fours

    60 is threes

    50 is half threes

    40 is forty

    30 is thirty

    20 is twenty

    10 is ten.

    Oh and a 100 is a hundred. So I dunno what happened between 50 and 90, but I’m sure there is a funny story behind that somewhere.




  • Honestly, there is no need for any of us to bomb the US when the US government pretty much does that already.

    For what it is worth, I hope your friends find better lives to where ever they have relocated. I also hope that you find a way to live that is happy and peaceful in spite of what is happening in your country.

    I am currently preparing myself for a semi-perminent state of war in Europe where Russia will terrorize in the east and America will terrorize in the west. I hope that it won’t get that far, but I am also preparing myself for my country being possibly invaded by America. Hopefully this won’t happen, but the way things are moving, I’m starting to preparing myself for it.

    I feel sad for the kids who have to grow up in this scenario. I hope my own nieces and nephews will get to experience a peaceful Europe again someday. The only good thing to come out of this is is that we have been forced to stand up for ourselves instead of relying on others. It was weak of us to believe that the rest of the world learned the same lessons during ww2 that we did. Russia obviously didn’t and neither did America. Where our takeaway from ww2 was humility, responsibility and forgiveness, the US spent decades making romantic war movies where they cast themselves as the heroes of ww2. It was always about glory and ego for the US. There was very little in understanding of the cost of that war and that makes sense because it didn’t happen in your backyard. And maybe that is why your country loves war so much. Because war never happens to you. It is something you inflict on others or use to make yourselves richer. (I don’t mean you personally, I’m talking about the institution)


  • Ah, don’t worry. I do not hold the American people responsible for what has happened to your country. When it comes down to it, the individual American has very little say in what it’s government is doing and in my opinion, your government has been very successful in manipulating its population into believing in a very untrue and very romantic image of how America is and how it is perceived in the world at large.

    So don’t apologize. You can’t help where you were born and raised, neither can the rest of the world’s population. I cant help that i was born and raised in a country that decided to spy on its european neighbors for America and i would be very annoyed if people online blamed me personally for what some retards in charge have decided to do. If anything, my sympathies goes out to people like you who are trapped in that hellhole. I do hope this is just a very unfortunate stumble in American history and that your country will return to form and eventually evolve socially like I have wished for you for decades.

    I will be honest, I have very few nice things to say about America, long before trump even came on my radar. I have despised America for most of my life, but I don’t hate all Americans. At all. It’s not your fault your country is built on a system that caters to the rich and teaches its people that all things that are good for the people is evil communism while all things good for the 1% is good for everybody. You guys deserves so much better.

    America as an institution and a public face on the world scene, however, I have no love for. I never had and I wasn’t surprised when it decided to stab us in the back the moment we needed it despite us bleeding money and young men’s blood for the American institution for 20 years. I am not surprised that we are being treated this way. It fits perfectly with the American playbook I have witnessed since I was a kid and saw Bush use 911 to invade the middle east and high key sent a message to the rest of us that if we weren’t on America’s side we would be their enemy. Which is partially why I think we ended up joining you in Iraq and Afghanistan.

    But no, I’m not surprised that this is our reward for bleeding for the American institution. Threats of annexing our territory, childish insults to our politicians, abandoning Ukraine and making friends with Russia. America has only ever cared about its own interests while pretending to be the world hero. All trump did was going mask off and that must be a shock to some Americans who believed the American institution was good and selfless.


  • Let me see… since new years you have threatened to annex Greenland, had Musk call our finest astronaut retarded, called our Prime Minister retarded, recently Roger Stone called one of our conservative politicians a sick demented asshole on Twitter when said politician asked for the general secretary of NATO to not joke about Trump and Greenland and… oh yeah, Trump and Vance attacked and insulted our dear friend, President Zelenskyj on world wide TV.

    So… how about no? Oh, I’m sorry: no, thank you.