god I hate living in utah everyone here is mormon
“Ok, everyone take your clothes off. We’re gonna shotgun some beers and then do butt stuff”
Can people who already sin join?
Everyone is welcome!
Yay butts
b-but the bible says premarital sex is the second worse thing to murder! we all need to get married to each other first, then the butt stuff.
It’s not sex, it’s butt stuff. Shut up and chug another beer
Let’s actually knock two birds off with one stone, lemme grab a funnel.
This guy knows how to party. I’ll get the zip ties and duct tape.
ive met quite a few mormons who drink monster/red bull instead of coffee because the scripture doesn’t say anything about energy drinks. always found that interesting (in the most neutral way possible)
yeah, it’s all stupid arbitrary rules. you aren’t allowed to drink any form of tea either. it also says any form of premarital sex is the second worse sin to murder. and of course there’s all the stuff they like to ignore, like the stuff about not divorcing or anything that doesn’t align with their business ideals of making money off the members
I believe the wording is “drinks which burn the throat” which naturally means:
- ❌ Coffee
- ❌ Alcoholic drinks
- ❌ Coca Cola
- ❌ Hot tea
- ❌ Chai lattes
- ✅ Sprite, other non-caffeinated soft drinks
- ✅ Hot Chocolate
- ✅ Kombucha
- ✅ Energy drinks???
- ✅ Herbal Tea (even while hot, but mostly if you’re sick as a home remedy)
Most of the focus is interpreted as “contains caffeine and/or alcohol” but the wording is vague enough that it leaves for a lot of weird wiggle room people try to argue (based on convenience usually). It’s quite silly
nah bubble tea is fine because it’s trendy
byu actually does have a bubble tea shop, but they make it without any real tea
real talk they have been trying to talk my argentine mormon aunt into giving up her matcha and it just makes her laugh
I have the first priesthood. they never say cocaine is a sin only that it’s unwise. I never claimed to be wise.
And do always remember to tell them that even some mild sinning can be INSANELY FUN!!! 🥳
“Shadow, it’s me, the Devil. I’m here to convince you to do sin.”
Good luck bringing the good word of sin to those poor lacking people of Utah.
I think I may be able to manage, just depends on the individual in question :)
I cohabitated with my girlfriend for 5 years. We’re happily married now. One of the first things she did was make a cross stitch that says “No longer living in sin” with our anniversary on it.
It’s beautiful.
The only place where if you’re offered uncut coke, you have to ask which kind.
She made a promise to god, which I intend to break.
