• mortemtyrannis@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      0
      ·
      3 months ago

      Ahhh they are inextricably linked to a previous partner and you’re expected to become a parental figure if the relationship goes anywhere serious.

      Some people (like me) really don’t want an instant family.

      I take my hat off to those who don’t have kids but date parents; they are better people than I.

      • I'm back on my BS 🤪@lemmy.autism.place
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        0
        ·
        3 months ago

        I wouldn’t mind doing it, but I would have to know the partner really well and feel confident that it would be a stable relationship. I remember having a hard time as a kid when I lost my aunt because her and my uncle had a nasty divorce where she went no contact.

        Pros of dating a parent:

        • You can see how they treat those that are vulnerable and dependent on them
        • They’re typically more stable, conscientious, and responsible
        • Good parents know that they have to model healthy behavior, so they practice those
        • You already know what you are getting with the kids, so it’s not a surprise
        • The kids inadvertently tell on the parent if the parent is misrepresenting themselves up front
        • Can do family activities that would normally be considered odd for only adults to partake
        • The many benefits of being a parent
        • If there’s shared custody, you regularly get time off from being a parent
        • oatscoop@midwest.social
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          3 months ago

          Getting older, with an established career makes spontaneity harder as it is. Add kids to the mix and it’s pretty much impossible.

          I … don’t want that. I like making last minutes plans, 1-2 week long trips, etc. The most limiting factor for me is dropping off my cat at one of my many friends/family members that can watch it (and I reciprocate with their pets).

          If I’m going to date it’s going to be with someone with a compatible lifestyle.