OP has the right goals, but having a kid doesn’t automatically change your life. Took the dude 9 months to start looking for a job? Yeah. Something tells me nothing is going to change.
Lots of terrible mothers that thought just having a kid would change their life.
It does change your life. We’re biologically wired to provide for our offspring. For fathers, the biological changes start only when the child is born and you see it and interact with it, so this “getting your shit together” starting at birth is actually perfectly normal and might certainly work.
The implication is the guy is only doing the right thing because he has to. Their point is that they didnt do anything different than before, they still aren’t taking any control or responsibility in their life.
And that was the point isn’t it? Now he HAS to. Motivation is a precious thing for some people. And if he is indeed doing the right thing because he has to, then by definition he is responsible.
We are animals. Deriding that fact and pretending we are not is nothing more than self delusion. Some of us are motivated by instincts while others are motivated by logic.
OP has the right goals, but having a kid doesn’t automatically change your life. Took the dude 9 months to start looking for a job? Yeah. Something tells me nothing is going to change.
Lots of terrible mothers that thought just having a kid would change their life.
It does change your life. We’re biologically wired to provide for our offspring. For fathers, the biological changes start only when the child is born and you see it and interact with it, so this “getting your shit together” starting at birth is actually perfectly normal and might certainly work.
The implication is the guy is only doing the right thing because he has to. Their point is that they didnt do anything different than before, they still aren’t taking any control or responsibility in their life.
And that was the point isn’t it? Now he HAS to. Motivation is a precious thing for some people. And if he is indeed doing the right thing because he has to, then by definition he is responsible.
I’m not sure I’d call that motivation. Maybe instinct? Like an animal is motivated.
We are animals. Deriding that fact and pretending we are not is nothing more than self delusion. Some of us are motivated by instincts while others are motivated by logic.
Although logic is a bunch of neurons instincting together.