I’ve observed if I say nothing (because I simply don’t know how to react), opinionated people think you agree with them, which I don’t. I don’t care.
what I want to tell him, next time he starts ranting: ‘I don’t care what you think, leave me alone’.
However, I may have to work with this person in the future, so what about ‘you don’t have to tell me everything you think, most of the time I don’t pay attention’ and if he keeps pushing it ‘it’s tiring working with a person who has to rant to feel good, it’s boring and makes me ignore you, which is a problem, because we work together.’ And leave.
What about ‘everybody has problems, maybe talk to a therapist? I cannot help you’.
Or maybe simply leaving when he starts his rants?
I’d like to keep work about work. This conversation is not appropriate for work.
I think this is the best answer. Think of it in terms of what would the boss (a good boss, that is) say? I can actually hear my managers say this. Many of the options here could be taken by the other person as you thinking you’re “better than” them. This is a fair and accurate response that doesn’t get personal.
Yeah it is important to set boundaries. It’s critical, actually. But it need not be judgmental or cruel. Work is a place where I go to give my time and labor for money. It’s nothing else. I have friends, family, and a therapist. OP’s coworker may not, and that is sad. But their behavior is hurting OP, which means it’s time to set a boundary.
You got pretty good answers last time you asked this. Were they insufficient? I don’t see that you responded to any of those answers: https://linux.community/post/837122
And clearly, he works/lives in a place where he has this kind of character around. It’s not really fair to say “why are people like this in general”.
Like if this guy works at a redneck pawnshop in the middle of nowhere, I can imagine he gets a disproportionate amount of these opinions from people who can’t read the room.
There are some good responses here.
I’d also add that any time something’s making you uncomfortable at work, it’s a good rule of thumb to document it. Who said what, date and time, etc.
It’s just good to have that info in case someone’s behavior gets worse.
amen. i got a shitty co worker fired. i complained about her multiple times, and so had aother people.
she would corner people in the breakroom and like brag about her sexual exploits loudly. it was sexual harassment. she’s also do it over the phone at her cube. it was disgusting.
“I’m not interested in discussing this matter with you; please drop the subject so I can focus on work.”
Politely insist he drop it multiple times. If he refuses, depending on how severely this is affecting you, you are well within your rights to seek out a supervisor to discuss the issue. But I’d be as plain and direct as possible to minimize any chance of him turning the tables on you and complaining to a superior first.
Or, make it clear you’re not interested and just go on ignoring him?
Say to them.
Look. I see you’re very heated on this subject, but I can’t afford to care right now. I don’t want to get worked up about this. All this conversation is going to do is bum me out or make me agitated. It’s not good for my work environment. I’m just trying to concentrate on my work and hopefully get through the day in a better mood than when it started.
Hey, let’s just focus on work right now.
And don’t engage with any of the other conversations
Not like they will get the reference.
We’ll bang okay?
I’m Commander Shepard and this is my favorite comment in this thread.
There’s a lot to be said from simply walking away from someone.
Yeah, just feign telephone call. It’s polite (kinda?), and hopefully he gets the message.
ignore them. why do you ahve to talk to this person about anything other than work?
because he engages, won’t disengage and I don’t know how to politely tell him to piss off.
I don’t want drama and people like this have a tendency for that.
I’m very tempted to choose a brain worm of your own and push that agenda at him to assert dominance, but that’s because I can be a passive-aggressive fuck if I feel someone is being overly aggressive.
Judgemental religious folk can bring out the Azathoth Hypothesis in me.
